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"The Difference Between Dreams and Reality" (A Self-Portrait), Oil on Canvas, 18x24 inches, Cynthia Gough-2004
Well, after reading a post by my friend
Sarah, I wrote a lengthy comment on her blog. So before you read any further, go there,
http://cerrahs.blogspot.com/ and then you’ll understand more about what I’m about to write. And also, here is my comment to her.
"Oh Sarah... You're making me cry now... The best times of my life were when I was in Del's classes painting, was I in that first portrait painting class with you that time? And for a semester, my first at SUU, I thought of doing something besides painting -graphic design. It was the only semester I hadn't taken a painting or drawing class. I took a graphic design class, and I hated it! I thought that possibly I wanted to become a graphic artist, because it would be "easier, "more "stable", or "easier" to find work. But as I took the class, I realized I hated it! During that semester, at my apartment one day, I decided to paint again. I cried, and fell in love all over again... I realized what I really loved. So after that I decided to go for the "useless" drawing and painting BA. And I loved every minute of it. The thing is, all my roommates thought I had it easy... "Oh, she's just an art major," No, it was hard work! Anyway, I don't know why it's been so hard for me to pick it back up... (I think the kids may have something to do with it...) Anyway, I just tell this story because you have inspired me to keep at it. What you have done is truly inspirational, I'm proud of you. I want to be like you. I should shut up, and go finish my painting I've been working on for 4-1/2 years now... Thank you! I want to see your painting up close, It's beautiful, amazing, no words to describe it, that's why we have art... Maybe I'll be put this novel in a post now..."
So, I also wanted to add that Sarah’s painting is amazing! She did everything right! I love the style, the model, the expression, and she captured all that Sarah wanted to about Eve. I also wanted to say that I’m so proud of Sarah. I’ve known her since middle school, so I’ve seen many things that she’s drawn and painted. She has improved tremendously, as you have seen! I remember me, Karolee (my cousin), and Sarah all had this art thing going together. Sometimes it seemed like we were sort of competing against each other… But now, it’s clear that Sarah is “winning.” (Not that it’s a competition.)
I’m so glad for her, but I’m jealous. Not jealous of her talent, but that I know I can do the same thing, but I’m not. Why haven’t I? I wanted to enter the
same competition. I had plans, but didn’t follow through… I don’t think it’s because I have two kids, and Sarah has one. One or two, doesn’t make too big of a difference. I think I just lost the willpower when it comes to art, I just always figured that I’d pick up art again once the kids go to school. But thanks to Sarah, I’ve realized that I need to keep at it. Why wait? I at very least need the practice. But I also need to keep going with my talent, to feel all that comes with it on a regular basis. I’ve known this all along, but I lost sight of it.
Art is a journey. I was talking to a friend earlier about her sharing her talent of writing poetry. She said she didn’t feel like she could because her poems are too personal. I feel like art is personal too, but the viewer only sees part of it, or the fruits of it. The other part is the personal journey that the artist goes on, the battle, the good times and the bad times, and trying to get it just right (even though it is never “just right” but always, “almost right.”)
I want to keep this journey in my life. I’ve had the goal of being a working artist, but I’ve known it will take time, especially when I still have kids at home. I can do whatever I want, if I plan for it. There’s precious naptime, and after the kids go to bed. So there are small increments here and there. I love “painting” my masterpieces, my kids, but I have plans for more. I have plans, plans to continue on my journey of art. If I just decide to, and plan for it, I know I can do it. I’m working on another
project (that I’m absolutely loving) at the moment, which will earn me money. But I have plans for my art to be part of that project in the future. I will be successful in whatever I dream because I know that, “Do or do not, there is no try”-Yoda. I have dreamed about my successful business as an artist, and if I endure to the end, and just do it, it will become reality. It will take time, but then my dreams right now will become my reality in the future. And my reality right now will turn into my dreams. It just depends on me.
And that, my friends, is the difference between dreams and reality.
Sorry for the novel, I just needed to get this out. And this seemed like a fine place...
This is the first time Max is even wearing a tie! (Even though you can't see it very well here) Don't worry, his tie is basically his bib now, because it was covered in drool by the end of church!
This is the first time Max is even wearing a tie! (Even though you can't see it very well here) Don't worry, his tie is basically his bib now, because it was covered in drool by the end of church!
I love you Travis!! Try to not be frustrated, and stay positive, will ya?
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We'll miss you guys until next time we see you at Thanksgiving...
